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“If you choose to (continue that behavior), you choose to (receive whatever consequence has already been established as a punishment)”.You might say, “Erin, if you choose to poke your sister again, you choose to not watch TV for the rest of the day”.
“That is not safe” or “Your skin is not for coloring on” is specific and helps them learn why things are off limits, rather than just that they are.
” This gives the child respect and responsibility for their actions.
I can’t tell you the number of times I hear that phrase when around other parents, even though it is highly ineffective.
If a child is coloring the grass purple, it is easy to tell them it must be green.
A kid can sit down on a chair facing the back, and we make them turn around.
Of course, there will be times when a task must be completed in a certain fashion (homework, etc.).
However, many times we force kids to do something the “right way”, when it could have been done in several ways.
When I think about all of the phrases, anecdotes, and sayings about the power of the spoken word I am reminded of how I changed my way of communicating with children upon learning Play Therapy principles.
I realize that using Play Therapy based language is a learned and practiced skill that requires time and effort, so I thought it would be helpful to share ten commonly used phrases parents say to their kids.
Choose whether the other person really needs to know about the issue, and if yes, let the child decide who will tell them.
“Do you choose to tell (Mom) what happened, or choose for me to tell her with you there to make sure that I explain it correctly?
Telling a child that they can’t do something makes them prove that they can, by telling you or showing you that it is in fact possible.